DIARY OF A GRANDFATHER: Man Flu- Is it Sexist?

Man Flu

At work the other day a lady in charge asked me if I would work another day for a colleague. She said he had “Man Flu”.

I was intrigued by the phrase she had used and started doing some research. Was this an urban myth or a real thing? Do men complain overly when sick? Is it sexist for a woman to accuse a man of having Man Flu?

It helped there was an article in the Age a few days later. Paradoxically it is men’s health week:

Man Flu?

The myth of the man flu has been disproved with new research showing men don't exaggerate cold and flu symptoms as much as we think.

Men have been keeping quiet about illness, which slows them from opening up about more serious health risks, according to a study conducted by the Medibank 24/7 Health Advice Line.

Men's Health Week begins on Monday, aiming to promote physical and emotional health and well being among Australian men, who have a life expectancy of four years less than women, according to the Australian Bureau of Statistics.

Four-fifths of male respondents to the study say they aren't badly affected by colds and fewer than one in ten expect to be looked after by their partner.

Telephone data shows women are twice as likely to call the advice line to discuss their symptoms and ask for information than men.

And while nearly half of women tell their loved ones when they feel under the weather, men are more likely to keep it a secret, thwarting the cliche that they complain unnecessarily.

The study shows that only a quarter of men tell their partner if they have a cold and fewer than one in ten tell their friends.

More than half of men don't take cough or cold medicine and only a third take Vitamin C or a natural remedy.

The Aussie male stereotype has led to men being silenced about important health matters, says Medibank's health line medical director Dr Georgia Karabatsos.

"It's really important, as a nation, that we don't let the Aussie male stereotype put pressure on the male population to stay silent about ill health or abnormalities," she said in a statement.

She says "man flu" is often joked about, but leads to some men feeling unable to discuss their health.

"While it's not necessary to seek advice for every cold, it's essential men feel able to discuss more serious symptoms," Dr Karabatsos said.

This article seemed to show that Man Flu is a myth. I mentioned it to the family as we sat around the fire after Wednesday night tea. (Family Ritual) I was surprised to find the female members of the family thought it a definite fact. Some thought I had suffered from it sometimes over the years! There were a few jokes at my expense. I was a bit non-plussed, it propelled me to the Internet and books for more research.

I knew that:

In Australia, men are more likely than women to have serious health problems. Men die in greater numbers than women from almost every non-sex-specific health problem.

Australian men are more likely than Australian women to get sick from serious health problems. Their mortality rate is also much higher. Men die in greater numbers than women from almost every non-sex-specific health problem. Overall, for every two women who die, three men die.

This figure holds true among children too. In deaths due to accidents or drowning, boys account for two out of three deaths.

Male deaths outnumber female deaths in every age group apart from the over-65 years, and only because so many men die before reaching retirement. Compared to women, men visit the doctor less frequently, have shorter visits and only attend when their illness is in its later stages.

High-risk groups

Australia ranks high in life expectancy rates. Only three other countries – Iceland, Japan and Hong Kong – have higher life expectancy rates for men. However, Australian men don’t live as long as Australian women. On average, Australian men can expect to live 79 years, compared to women who can expect to live 84 years.
Certain male population groups in Australia have a lower life expectancy than 79 years, including:

Australian Aborigine and Torres Strait Islander men

Migrant men

Men who live in rural and remote areas of Australia

Socially disadvantaged men

Men with disabilities

Men who are in prison

Non-heterosexual men, including gay, bisexual and transgender males

Intersex people.

Top 10 causes of premature death in men

According to data collected by the Australian Bureau of Statistics in 2008, the leading causes of death for Australian men include, in order from first to last:

Ischaemic heart disease

Trachea and lung cancer

Strokes

Chronic lower respiratory disease

Prostate cancer

Dementia and Alzheimer’s disease

Colon and rectum cancer

Blood and lymph cancer, including leukaemia

Diabetes

Suicide.

Some deaths are more likely for men than women

Some causes of death are related to sex (or gender). For example, a man cannot die during childbirth, because only women have babies. Similarly, a woman cannot die from prostate cancer, because only men have a prostate gland.

However, according to 2008 data from the Australian Bureau of Statistics, men outnumber women in many causes of non-sex-related deaths. For example:

Suicide – 78 per cent of deaths are male

Trachea and lung cancers – 63 per cent of deaths are male

Blood and lymph cancers (including leukaemia) – 57 per cent of deaths are male

Chronic lower respiratory diseases – 54 per cent of deaths are male

Colon and rectum cancers – 54 per cent of deaths are male

Ischaemic heart disease – 53 per cent of deaths are male.

A range of theories

It is clear that women are healthier than men, but why? Some of the theories that attempt to explain the health differences between the sexes include:

In Australia, more money is spent on the healthcare needs of women and children than is spent on the healthcare needs of men. The healthcare system reflects this bias. For example, the waiting room of most medical clinics has women’s magazines and children’s toys. This subtly suggests that men aren’t as welcome.

Men are more likely than are women to work full-time. Office hours for most medical clinics coincide with typical work hours, so men in full-time employment find it difficult to make an appointment. (Of course, this is also true for women who work full-time.)

Men, particularly older men, typically prefer to see a male doctor for intimate or embarrassing issues. However, the family doctor may be female.

Men are traditionally encouraged to do the high-risk jobs that are stressful, dangerous and deadly such as mining, logging and construction.

Men are encouraged by our culture to be tough and independent. Some men could believe that visiting doctors or complaining of feeling ill are threats to their masculinity.

‘Macho’ men

Men in Western societies such as Australia are less inclined than women to take an active role in maintaining their health. They are also less likely to seek professional help for problems, particularly those of an emotional nature. Some of the social and cultural reasons for this include:

The Western definition of masculinity includes strength and silence. Men may feel that it is a sign of weakness or ‘femininity’ to seek help.

Males, particularly teenagers, tend to act as if they are invulnerable. This can lead to destructive behaviours such as drug or alcohol binges, or reckless driving.

Women are more likely to have regular contact with doctors because of reproductive issues such as menstrual periods, contraception and pregnancy. Men don’t have a similar reason that requires them to regularly see a doctor.

Socioeconomic status

The ‘macho’ theory proposes that men may start looking after themselves if they stopped behaving like tough guys. However, some researchers believe that blaming cultural constructs of masculinity is a way of passing the buck. Bad health may be the fault of the social environment in which the men live. It has been well documented around the world that poverty breeds disease.

The importance of employment

Many researchers have demonstrated the direct link between employment status and men’s health. Issues include:

A man’s self-esteem is closely linked to his role as breadwinner. Unlike women, men aren’t as strongly encouraged to find self-worth in the roles of parent and homemaker.

Unemployment puts great financial and emotional strain on a family. The man, as breadwinner, may feel burdened with guilt and shame.

Men without trades who go from one unskilled job to another are more likely to feel devastated by periods of unemployment.

Men who feel in control of their lives are more likely to look after their health. Men who are unemployed often feel helpless.

Male depression

One out of every six Australian men suffers from depression at any given time. Statistics include:

Teenagers and the elderly are particularly at risk.

Male depression is associated with an increased risk of health disorders such as cardiovascular disease and diabetes.

Men are likely to resort to destructive behaviours in an attempt to deal with depression.

Depressed men are twice as likely as depressed women to abuse alcohol and drugs. Men often try to manage their symptoms of depression by using alcohol and other drugs, which make the symptoms worse.

Depression is a known high-risk factor for suicide. According to the Australian Bureau of Statistics, men of all ages suicide at a higher rate than women.

Where to get help

Your doctor

Men’s health clinic

Australian Men’s Shed Association Tel. 1300 550 009

Things to remember

Australian men are more likely to get sick from serious health problems than Australian women.

Men die in greater numbers than women from almost every non-sex-specific health problem.

Compared to women, men visit the doctor less frequently, have shorter visits, and only attend when their illness is in its later stages.

In spite of all these statistics about the damming state of men’s health; why was there this myth about Man Flu. Even among well educated women like my daughters?

Is it something to do with woman’s biological makeup?

For a woman to feel feminine, she must be with a man who is masculine

Even though there's been a trend away from the alpha male of the 1970s and 1980s, most women prefer strong men.

While most men look for good looks and good bodies, women need reliable, independent and strong-minded men. They look for men who take charge.

Psychologist Asiphe Ndlela, who is based in Illovo, Johannesburg, says girls are subconsciously hard-wired to respond sexually to men with higher values than themselves and also to men with higher values than other men in their circles.

"You'd think women like men who are soft, weak and romantic, but if there is one thing that turns women on, it is a man with dominance and aura.

"Men are aroused by being dominant and by submissive women, while women are aroused by being submissive and by dominant men. In the bedroom, inequality beats equality," Ndlela says.

She says women can spot a man who lacks dominance miles away, and adds that almost every quality of a dominant male trigger arousal in the female brain. These include dominant scents, dominant gaits, deep voices, height, swagger, bravado and displaying wealth.

Ndlela says human beings are by nature not attracted to someone who conveys powerlessness.

"For a woman to feel womanish, she must be with a man who is masculine. When she is with a guy who is not dominant, she feels he is just another girl.

"Many men are motivated to act when they sense or perceive a woman's desire for security or for some external strength," she says.

Ndlela says most women have submission fantasies and immensely popular submission themes on television are not helpful. She says most heterosexual women are wired to find sexual submission arousing, but this is not the case in human beings or in most female mammals.

What characteristics does a dominant man have?

Ndlela says he is ambitious, a doer, comfortable in his own skin, confident and he exudes power.

She says in every woman is a deep-rooted instinct that prompts her to gravitate to such males.

But one should never seek other people's approval on how to behave in a social situation and never to be concerned what others think of you, she says.

"Being a dominant male is all about attitude and projecting the image of fun to be with, that you are in control. To attract women, stand with your feet six to ten inches apart and your toes pointing outward," Ndlela says.

She explains that some men who are dominated by their partners may have experienced abuse in childhood.

"This is often due to psychological conditioning, where they have been taught to associate domination and pain as a form of love.

"Another explanation from psychology is that some men resent, or are uncomfortable with, the idea that a man must always be in control," she says.

For these men, says Ndlela, a dominant woman is a relief from having to make decisions, asserting authority and initiating new ideas.

They don't mind a woman taking charge. In fact, they love it. They look for women who will "wear the trousers" in the home.

Ndlela says these men are attracted to strong and confident women, who likewise enjoy holding the reins

It seems Man Flu has more to do with womans attitude toward men then men themselves.

A variety of articles support this theory that in biological terms a women is attracted to a dominant assertive male, the very antithesis of a Man Flu type male.