The Vow or What If's

The Vow

or "What If"

Just watched a movie called The Vow  its a nice sentimental soft movie based on a true story (The true story is even more remarkable I think-see below)  but the premise got me thinking and thus writing...

The premise is that a couple are in a loving relationship been married four years and living a life of middle class progressive left intellectual independent inner city lives. And being madly in love with each other and their world. A typical newly married or partner thing.

All of a sudden their world is turned upside down by an accident which leaves the wife without a memory of the past five or six years. The plot is further thickened by a domineering family who have been estranged (by an incident which is revealed in the movie) from the daughter but who now come in and try to take over the daughters life and mould it into their vision again. The interesting play between husband and parents is a bit dramatic but is interesting none the less. It reflects the often bitter sweet entrance of a son/daughter in law into a family and the what if's scenario.

We have all sort of the "what if's" if I had not gone there, if I had said that, if I had done this, if I was better at that, if I had taken that route, if I had said yes, If I had said no, If I met him/her etc etc...It is an unmistakable fact that we live our life in a reality shaped by the unreality or shadow image of the "what if's"  they mould us like a shadow universe or parallel world.

The husband in the movie says we are the result of or product of "Moments with impact" what he is really saying is that we are a product of our decisions and also of those random moments of uncertainty and chance that can pick any of us up and drop at an unknown destination. The true meaning of the story for me is that no matter what we have or where we are at the moment we have decisions and or a decision to make. This is captured on the quote below.

A quote from the real woman who lost her memory. ‘Slowly and steadily, we created those memories together, and everything else slowly started to fall into place,’ she says. ‘Slowly, over time, my love did grow for Kim deeply, but it was never a fluffy, gooey falling-in-love feeling again. I know that is what everyone wants to hear, but that is not what happened second time around,’ she says, with brutal honestly. ‘My heart didn’t skip beats; I didn’t feel swept off my feet. I would love to have felt that, but it isn’t the truth - I made a choice to love him.’

You have a choice, you always have a choice no matter the "what if's" and situation or uncertainty you find yourself in. Make that choice and go with it, yesterday is a shadow and tomorrow is a probability, your choice is the now.